Parents told to lead by example and turn off phones this Christmas

Dame Rachel revealed to the Press Association that children are "crying out" for genuine engagement with their relatives over the festive break, emphasizing the critical need for "phone-free time." Her observations are starkly supported by a recent survey indicating that nearly half of parents with children aged 18 or younger intend to permit phone usage at the Christmas dinner table this year. "I can’t tell you how many children tell me about sitting at dinner and the parents are on the phone," Dame Rachel lamented, issuing a direct appeal: "So this Christmas, let’s turn them off." This sentiment resonates deeply, as research conducted by More in Common for Yondr reveals that almost four in 10 adults acknowledge that smartphones have negatively impacted their Christmas experience in some capacity.

The Children’s Commissioner candidly admitted to her own past transgressions with phone use during meal times, but stressed the paramount importance of establishing clear guidelines for everyone within the household, not just the younger generation. "We have to lead as adults," Dame Rachel asserted, articulating a principle of shared responsibility. "We can’t talk about banning for the kids if we’re not doing it ourselves." Her timely intervention coincides with the launch of a comprehensive new guide designed to equip parents with essential tips for ensuring children’s online safety and establishing healthy boundaries for screen time.

Joining this chorus of concern, Pete Etchells, a psychology professor at Bath Spa University, highlighted to BBC News that Christmas presents an ideal opportunity to initiate constructive conversations with children about cultivating balanced and healthy relationships with technology. "It’s not about feeling guilty or ashamed of our tech use, but noticing it more," he advised. "And striking up conversations about what we’re happy with, and what we would like to be doing differently." This approach encourages introspection and open dialogue, fostering a collaborative effort to navigate the digital landscape.

The new guide, meticulously developed by the Commissioner and readily accessible online via the Children’s Commissioner’s website, aims to support parents who may feel "overwhelmed" by the "mixed messages" surrounding online safety. Informed by extensive child focus groups, the resource offers a wealth of "practical tips" and "conversation starters." These are designed to facilitate discussions on a range of critical topics, including effective strategies for managing screen time, navigating negative online experiences, and understanding the burgeoning world of artificial intelligence (AI).

The insights gleaned from teenagers aged 13 to 18 are particularly illuminating. They shared with Dame Rachel their acceptance of the fact that negative online experiences can occur, viewing them as an almost inevitable component of the digital realm. These young individuals recounted instances of being contacted by strangers, encountering pornography, and being aware of intimate images of their peers being shared without consent. In light of these disclosures, Dame Rachel underscored the absolute necessity for parents to "talk early and talk often" with their children about their online presence, fostering an environment of trust and open communication.

Arabella Skinner, from Health Professionals for Safer Screens, echoed this sentiment, emphasizing to BBC News that the implementation of simple, yet effective, rules can make a significant difference in mitigating the negative impacts of technology. She proposed practical strategies such as creating a dedicated family plan for device usage or designating a specific box where mobile phones can be safely stored during mealtimes. "Children feel most secure and content when they have our full attention, eye contact, and presence," she stated, underscoring the fundamental human need for connection and undivided attention. "It is so important that we, as adults, spend time with our children and not always looking at screens."

The urgency of this issue is further amplified by a recent report published by the regulator Ofcom earlier this month. This report highlighted significant concerns raised by children regarding the detrimental effects of prolonged screentime, often described as "brain rot." The findings revealed that children aged between eight and 14 are currently spending an average of nearly three hours online each day, with a staggering quarter of that time occurring between the hours of 2100 and 0500. This statistic paints a concerning picture of disrupted sleep patterns and potential developmental impacts, underscoring the vital need for parental intervention and the establishment of healthier digital habits. The Children’s Commissioner’s initiative, therefore, arrives at a crucial juncture, providing parents with the tools and encouragement they need to reclaim family time and foster a more balanced and connected Christmas experience for all. The emphasis on leading by example is not merely a suggestion but a fundamental shift in approach, recognizing that the most impactful lessons are often learned through observation and imitation. By consciously choosing to put down their phones, parents can create a powerful ripple effect, encouraging their children to do the same and fostering a Christmas filled with genuine connection, meaningful conversations, and shared moments of joy, free from the constant distraction of the digital world. The festive season, traditionally a time for togetherness and reflection, can thus be transformed into an opportunity to strengthen family bonds and create lasting memories, unmarred by the ubiquitous glow of screens.